Though entertaining enough, this play appears in its entirety as a small part of Sorrentino's magnum opus MULLIGAN STEW. You can read it as easily there as in this form. Plus you'll have the rest of Mulligan Stew as well. So I recommend you only buy this volume if you're the sort of collector who owns books because of what they are, not what they say.
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A baseball bat is a smooth wooden or metal club used in the sport of baseball to hit the ball after it is thrown by the pitcher. By regulation it may be no more than 2.75 inches (70 mm) in diameter at the thickest part and no more than 42 inches (1,100 mm) long. Although historically bats approaching 3 pounds (1.4 kg) were swung, today bats of 33 ounces (0.94 kg) are common, topping out at 34 ounces (0.96 kg) to 36 ounces (1.0 kg).
At bat Baltimore chop Bat flip Chinese home run Batting count Bunt sacrifice bunt slap bunt squeeze play Checked swing Cleanup hitter Designated hitter Double Double switch Foul ball Foul tip Golden sombrero Grand slam Ground rule double Hat trick Hit Hit and run Hit by pitch Hitting for the cycle Home run Infield hit Inside-the-park home run Leadoff hitter Lefty-righty switch Line drive Moonshot Plate appearance Platoon system Pull hitter Sacrifice fly Single Strikeout Strike zone Sweet spot Switch hitter Triple Walk Walk-off home run
Within league standards there is ample latitude for individual variation, many batters settling on their own bat profile, or one used by a successful batter. Formerly, bats were hand-turned from a template with precise calibration points; today they are machine-turned to a fixed metal template. Historically significant templates may be kept in a bat manufacturers' vault; for example, Babe Ruth's template, which became popular among major-league players, is R43 in the Louisville Slugger archives.
To figure out who shoots first, players usually throw or roll a baseball to a certain object (usually at close range) and whoever is closest shoots first. The first person then gets to choose the first hole and tees off. To tee off (and for most shots) players hit the ball like they were playing baseball, but depending on the distance from the hole the player may choose to ‘putt’ the ball instead of hitting it. To putt the ball, the player places the ball on the cup (the end of the fungo bat), and can toss the ball from the cup in hopes of getting a more accurate shot. In shooting or putting, the player must have one foot where the ball landed during the entire duration of their swing or putt, failure to keep the foot planted results in a loss of a stroke. Scorekeeping is identical to traditional golf; the player with the fewest strokes essentially wins the hole. Players traditionally play nine or eighteen holes of fungo golf, and at the end the person with the fewest strokes in the set number of holes wins the game.