Though entertaining enough, this play appears in its entirety as a small part of Sorrentino's magnum opus MULLIGAN STEW. You can read it as easily there as in this form. Plus you'll have the rest of Mulligan Stew as well. So I recommend you only buy this volume if you're the sort of collector who owns books because of what they are, not what they say.
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Catcher's equipment - A catcher is the target for the pitcher, so the catcher must wear protective gear that covers the majority of his body. Catcher's gear includes a helmet with a faceguard that is similar to a hockey goalie's mask, a chest protector, shin guards, and a special padded glove. Some catcher's also wear devices called knee savers, which are triangular pads that attach to the players calves and rest his knees even while squatting behind the plate.
When it comes to baseball gloves, it's not uncommon for players to develop a deep attachment to their glove. It's the same glove they trot out onto the field with every inning and many players, once they are into the 'adult' sizes, use the same glove for their entire life! It might seem crazy to outsiders, but there's just something about a high quality, leather baseball glove that becomes part of a player to the point that it feels wrong to wear a different glove. That is why it is so important to find the right glove, the right pocket, the right size, the right leather, and the right color. Gloves aren't just gloves, they are part of who you become as a player. Check out our selection of gloves by position, size, and brand or explore the buying guide specifically made to help you decide which baseball glove to buy if you need some guidance!
Fungo bats typically weigh between 17 to 22 ounces and may be as long as 37 inches, making them longer than most bats used for hitting. According to Pro Bats, a typical professional baseball player uses a bat that is about 34 inches long and weighs about 32 ounces, although there is considerable variation. Fungo bats not only are longer than regular bats, they also are skinnier. Like regular bats, fungo bats can be made of metal or wood.
Versatile fungo bats are the ones tailored for both outfield and infield practice. Infield bats are effective for those that desire to rip their ball to the young ball hawks. These bats are thicker and heavier through the center in order to give you more oomph. Thicker bats work better especially to softball coaches to hit bigger balls utilized for softball.

A rounded, solid wooden or hollow aluminum bat. Wooden bats are traditionally made from ash wood, though maple and bamboo is also sometimes used. Aluminum bats are not permitted in professional leagues, but are frequently used in amateur leagues. Composite bats are also available, essentially wooden bats with a metal rod inside. Bamboo bats are also becoming popular.


Many players "bone" their bats, meaning that before games, they rub their bats repeatedly with a hard object, believing this closes the pores on the wood and hardens the bat. Animal bones are a popular boning material, but rolling pins, soda bottles and the edge of a porcelain sink have also been used. Pete Rose had his own way of hardening his bats: he soaked them in a tub of motor oil in his basement then hung them up to dry.[25]
Helmet worn by batter to protect the head and the ear facing the pitcher from the ball. Professional models have only one ear protector (left ear for right-handed batters, right ear for lefties), amateur and junior helmets usually have ear protectors on both sides, for better protection from loose balls, and to reduce costs to teams (all players can use the same style of helmet).
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Many players "bone" their bats, meaning that before games, they rub their bats repeatedly with a hard object, believing this closes the pores on the wood and hardens the bat. Animal bones are a popular boning material, but rolling pins, soda bottles and the edge of a porcelain sink have also been used. Pete Rose had his own way of hardening his bats: he soaked them in a tub of motor oil in his basement then hung them up to dry.[25]

“They’re not moving, their feet are apart, their gloves are on the ground, backs are flat, and they’re working down to up, out to in, basically a steady roll back and forth probably 15 to 20 each,” Bates said. “Then they’ll turn their body, work glove side for another 15 to 20, and backhand 15 to 20. No movement, really, just making sure we’re watching the ball roll into our glove, fielding it, and doing all the things fundamentally correct.”

To figure out who shoots first, players usually throw or roll a baseball to a certain object (usually at close range) and whoever is closest shoots first. The first person then gets to choose the first hole and tees off. To tee off (and for most shots) players hit the ball like they were playing baseball, but depending on the distance from the hole the player may choose to ‘putt’ the ball instead of hitting it. To putt the ball, the player places the ball on the cup (the end of the fungo bat), and can toss the ball from the cup in hopes of getting a more accurate shot.[1] In shooting or putting, the player must have one foot where the ball landed during the entire duration of their swing or putt, failure to keep the foot planted results in a loss of a stroke. Scorekeeping is identical to traditional golf; the player with the fewest strokes essentially wins the hole.[2] Players traditionally play nine or eighteen holes of fungo golf, and at the end the person with the fewest strokes in the set number of holes wins the game.[3]
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